Love Letter to Self

February is an excellent month to recommit ourselves to ourselves.

After a weekend of chocolate, decadent desserts plus expressions of love and desire, it might be on your mind to reflect on your heart’s desire today.  For some, this Monday might feature a recapitulation of all that is wrong and missing in one’s love life.

So I would argue that we stop and consider:

“What IF YOU decided to become the best Love of your life?”

Yes, I said it. What if it (true love) were here inside of you and not out there in some other person? Sometimes we aren’t ready to admit that the love that we truly need is from ourselves.  In a recent worship experience, I realized that one of my biggest obstacles was giving myself forgiveness for all the ways that I put myself last. (We won’t go over those here…. but you know we all have list…)

What if your own ability to love and care for yourself was what you really needed? What if your acceptance of YOU in all your flaws was the Key to unlocking your own soul?  You deserve to love yourself better than anyone.  After the unconditional love of a Supreme Creator, you got next. You should love the hair on your head, the soles of your feet, and every stop in between. So don’t delay.  Start right now! Spend some time writing to your own heart’s desire.  “How do I love thee? Let me count the ways….”

Yes, you got this.  Worst case scenario is that you need some practice because it has been so long.  How do I love me? I am making the time to do the things I love, and I am committed to unraveling myself from time commitment that bore me to tears and that work my first and last nerves.  More later…

So grab a pen right now, and get started..

Self Care is a revolutionary act!

 

I can’t seem to get over that line.

“In my mind, I see a line. And over that line, I see green fields, and lovely flowers, and beautiful white women with their arms stretched out to me over that line. But, I can’t seem to get there no how. I can’t seem to get over that line.”  

 “That was Harriet Tubman in the 1800s,” she said. “And let me tell you something, the only thing that separates women of color from anyone else is opportunity. You can not win an Emmy for roles that are simply not there.”

 – Viola Davis wins 2015 Emmy for Outanding Drama Actress

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When I read this quote, it reminded me of a concept called race related trauma. I experienced this term in researching the sources of depression in people of color back in the early 2000s.  It’s a little like the “I can’t breathe” mantra that was prevalent after the murder of Eric Garner by choke hold at the hands of an NYPD officer.  For generations, women of color (and others) have been striving to cross a line that seems visible yet is no less impossible. In fact I would argue that this is primarily WHY race related trauma is so insidious.  We feel we SHOULD be able to cross the line.  Hell, it’s been over 200 years since Harriet Tubman uttered these words.  Our country is in a dream that suggests  ‘Post-racial America” is evenly and fairly distributed.  We get what we earn, and if you are poor, it is because you deserve it.  If your accomplishments are not recognized, then perhaps you should work harder. Yet, black women across the globe are the hardest working of all humanity.  Despite generations of sowing and harvesting, they were left with little to feed their own families after making sure everyone else’s babies were full.  So now, we must ask ourselves, what is the line that we are struggling to cross? What is the opportunity that seems nearly impossible to grasp? What losses are we grieving?  Depression is made more powerful by the silence it evokes.  Tell your story. Write your story. Be bold. Erase the Line.